Gay marriage

The passing of the gay marriage act

Hurray! Now we can all marry whoever we want!

Great news! I’ll marry Carol Vorderman, then.

But she’s already married.

But you just said we can marry whoever we want.

Oh. Well, what I meant was: we can all marry whoever we want as long as they’re not already married to someone else.

OK. Not Carol Vorderman, then. I’ll marry Nigella Lawson.

How do you know Nigella Lawson?

I’ve never even met her, but you just said we can marry whoever we want as long as they’re not already married to someone else.

Well, what I meant was: we can all marry whoever we want as long as they’re not already married to someone else, AND you know them (and they want to marry you).

OK. Not Nigella Lawson either. I know - I’ll marry my sister.

You can’t marry your sister.

Go on – why not?

OK. We can all marry whoever we want as long as they’re not already married to someone else, and you know them, and they want to marry you, AND you’re not a close relative.

Hold on! You’re already married!

So?

Right. Listen. We can all marry whoever we want as long as they’re not already married to someone else, and you know them, and they want to marry you, and you’re not a close relative, and you’re not already married.

So we can’t actually marry whoever we want?

No, I suppose not.

I thought it was all so simple now!